GT eh?

There’s an annoying… feature, shall we say, in GTA IV, which also happens in previous GTA games that I’ve played, if I recall correctly. You take your shiny sports car on a little cruise around the block, stopping off along the way at the local supermarket to slaughter some innocent geriatric trying to select a zucchini from the vegetable counter.

As you do.

Why your Russian crime lord boss, owner of half of downtown pseudo-New York, wants you to kill an incontinent old man with a penchant for squashes, I’ll never know, but we in the hired gun trade shoot first and ask questions later.

Questions like: “Can I get zucchini and blood stains out of my suit at 40 degrees?” and “Where the hell has my car gone?”

Because every time I take a shiny car to a mission in GTA IV it’s never there when I come out at the completion of said mission. Gone. Not a trace to be found. It’s as if someone stole it! There I am, standing in the middle of the street like a complete lemon, looking up and down and wondering how the hell I’m going to get home. Strips of zucchini dangling from my forehead. I’m gutted, I feel violated. Robbed.

It took me bloody ages to steal that car.

4 thoughts on “GT eh?

  1. Ysharros

    More homesickness.

    Now I want to say “Go for a spin around the block in your shiny sportscar and…

    Get yourself something niiiiiice!”

    Thanks for the entertainment (and I mean that in a good way).

  2. Melmoth

    @Ysh You’re welcome! I’m always happy to make people sick, whether it be for their home or otherwise.

    @Aaron Tsk! Still, as long as it was for a decent cause, and you weren’t rushing injured orphans and puppies to the hospital or anything.

    @Stargazer Sure, I locked it in the usual way: driving the car into so many pedestrians and walls that the door was jammed shut. Come to think of it though, there was a distinct lack of windows. Or roof. Hmmm.

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