Tuesday 13 September 2011

Also coming soon to KiaSA-TV

Don’t worry if sports aren’t really your thing, KiaSA-TV has plenty of other new series coming to the Autumn schedules!

Cash In The Bank Vault: A cash-strapped character calls in a team of experts to rummage through their bank vault to find items to sell off to raise the money for a new mount. Will Gostekillah’s dented shield, level three shortsword and pile of boar intestines reach their 500 gold target at auction?

Who Do You Think You Were?: The award winning documentary series continues investigating character genealogy. This week, with the help of Blizzard’s server transfer and name change records, an Undead Warrior is surprised to find she started out as a male Night Elf.

Strictly Mailbox Dancing: Eight amazing celebrities including a backing singer who once featured on a song that reached number 37 in the charts in 1986, the male sock model from the Littlewoods catalogue and a Liberal Democrat district councillor from Chipping Norton are matched up with professional mailbox dancers to choreograph and perform a mailbox dance, starting at the inn in Redridge and building up to the grand final outside the Ironforge auction house. There’s a new judging panel this year featuring Illidan Stormrage as The Nasty One(tm) after Grom Hellscrem slightly misunderstood his brief to provide “cutting feedback” in the last series and sliced up Torquay United’s reserve goalkeeper from the ’92-’93 season and an actress who briefly appeared in four episodes of EastEnders.

The Auction House Roadshow: Cold-eyed money-grabbers queue up with items for appraisal by a panel of experts, claiming they “got them for a couple of coppers in a jumble sale in Sillithus” or “inherited them from Uncle Bob after he inadvisedly tried to solo a dragon” when everyone knows they used a plugin to buy them from auction in the hope of a quick profit. Viewers are really waiting the expert’s verdict “Well, it’s a lovely piece; valyrian steel blade and a beautiful enamel inlay on the hilt. Of course before the 3.4.9 patch these were incredibly sought after, but since the nerf to the swing speed the value has really plummeted to a couple of gold, perhaps double that for insurance purposes”, and seeing how convincingly the owner can lie through gritted teeth “oh the value isn’t important at all, we just really loved the design of it”.

Have I Got MMOnews For You: Nah, that would never work.

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