There is no armour against fate, Death lays his icy hand on kings.

Although not necessarily the unique level of customisation that I love my characters to have, here are couple of screenshots of my Warden to show just a smidgen of the lovely cosmetic armour options available in Lord of the Rings Online. I say it’s not terribly unique because the black armour is a very popular level 50ish crafted set often used for the cosmetic look, and the red armour is one of the new purely cosmetic sets granted by ordering the Isengard expansion, so expect to see everyone, his wife and her lover, in that set of armour in the future. That’s not to say you can’t craft a unique look in LotRO, you could mix and match the two sets presented here to your heart’s content in order to create a new and more distinctive look, not to mention the fact that a simple cloak here, a different hood or helmet there, and you can take even the most standard of armour sets and make them your own.

What I like most, however, is that my character’s breasts don’t enter a room twenty seconds ahead of her; that you can’t tell what colour her underwear is; that despite still maintaining the archetypal svelte fantasy female form, I find it hard to picture her prostrate on a beach towel in the sunny Bahamas, or on a bed in an adult movie; and that despite all of this, the ever-pleasant womanly form is still subtly evident.

That’s what I like. Each to their own, of course, but I’m so glad there are games such as Lord of the Rings Online around that allow me play a character with some form of dignity.

And seeing as this seems to be a bit of a cosmetic screenshot post, here are the adventuring outfits for my Burglar, Guardian and Champion.


If you enjoy playing with outfits in LotRO, be sure to check out the Cosmetic LotRO blog for lots of splendidly creative options, where each post comes complete with an item list to help you hunt down the most dapper of jackets and fanciest of pants.

And finally, from the screenshot archive, the Hideous Horse Eye of DOOM.


It’s coming for YOU.

16 thoughts on “There is no armour against fate, Death lays his icy hand on kings.

  1. Roq

    “There is no armour against fate”

    That’s because fate increases tactical critical rating and tactical damage ignores armour.

    Isn’t it amazing how Shirley anticipates features of LOTRO as far back as four centuries ago? The pre-launch hype hadn’t even started then.

  2. suzita

    oh i was all hear hear to nice looking female armour which doesn’t look as though I make ends meet by doing some exotic dancing in my spare time and then i saw the horse… LOL!

  3. Helistar

    Hmmm a completely different approach from my warden (a female elf). I use a crimson-painted level 41 tailor-guild medium armor set. No helm at all (just a circlet), I’ve yet to find one which doesn’t look horrible.
    I’ll see if I can prepare a screenshot and post it somewhere.

  4. Melmoth Post author

    @welshtroll: It’s the Hypnotoad of Middle Earth.

    @Roq: “Isn’t it amazing how Shirley anticipates features of LOTRO as far back as four centuries ago?”

    It Shirley is.

    @suzita: You laugh now, but at the time I barely escaped with my mind intact, and our readers would probably debate even that.

    @Helistar: If you can pop it on Flickr or such like, you should be able to display it in the comments here using standard HTML tags.

  5. Jonathan B

    Looks like you trend towards practical colors in your outfits, suited to moving through the terrain unremarked. I can’t help but think of Vikings.

    I tend towards the bright and vivid for the most part. Impractical for sneaking through forests, but evil creatures have very poor eyesight that is only sharpened by pain. At least, that’s my theory of why they can’t see a bright red elf dancing twelve feet away but can instantaneously spot the source of an arrow fired into their shoulder from 50 feet away on a hilltop a dozen feet high. ;)

    My surprise successful color combination of the moment is doing my Loremaster up entirely in orange.

  6. Roq

    “Looks like you trend towards practical colors in your outfits, suited to moving through the terrain unremarked”

    Well the truth is I would have preferred a slinkier outfit, but she wouldn’t have it: “What would that look like after a long forced march?”, she seemed to be saying, “it will turn to rags after the first shower” … and she will insist on wearing that hat which looks like an inverted coal scuttle to me.

  7. foolsage

    @Melmoth: Hypnotoads are in game, in the Water-works of Moria. Well, they’re not called “hypnotoads”, but when you fight them they commonly poison you with a hallucinogenic effect. And there’s a quest chain in the Water-works called “All Glory” that involves the toads.

  8. Gankalicious

    What? Are you kidding? So this Breastplate of Fate Resistance +2 is a phony? Good god, I’ve been had again. It looked so nice with my Helmet of Sarcasm +4 as well…oh bugger.

  9. Melmoth Post author

    @Roq: A most splendid outfit! It’s great that there are nice sets of armour on the NPC vendors for all levels, so that players have options for cosmetic items right from the outset.

    @Jonathan B: I did enjoy strong colours on my characters in Warhammer Online, but LotRO just seems to have a more sombre palette in general. That’s not to say that a bright royal blue or ravishing red doesn’t look stunning on the right armour. It’s all a matter of personal taste, of course.

    @suzita: Now I’m singing it again. That’s twice!

    @foolsage: Good point! It’s the Eye of Sauron of Middle Ear… no wait, that one doesn’t work either.

    @Gankalicious: At least the +3 Underpants of the Golden Wood still work. Or are you just pleased to see me?

  10. Gankalicious

    Golde Wood- now wouldn’t that be a dilema. I could use the money from the gold, but I’m not sure it would be worth the sacrifice. Depends on the quantity of Gold, I guess, and the current market price….. and is married Golden Wood worth the same as, say, single Golden Wood? Hmmm….

  11. Jonathan B

    @Melmoth @Roq My personal theory is that my wizar…I mean Loremaster is just waiting for Sunny Delight to be invented so he can rake in the sponsorship money. Imagine the sales potential of asking a group of ruffians “Wouldn’t you rather be drinking Sunny D?” right before striking one dead with a column of fatal light from the sky! You could partner with a hobbit saleswagon to follow behind you, provided you could keep them from drinking all the product for elevensies.

  12. Roq

    @JB sounds like you have a very original way of role playing :). Had to look up Sunny Delight, but now we’ve all moved to US (virtually speaking), I’ll be on the look out for a lore master purporting to be a soft drink vendor.

  13. Jonathan B

    @Roq *grins* Admittedly, I wouldn’t try the Sunny D angle on an RP-focused server of course. :) You might find such an orange WizardImeanLoremaster on Dwarrowdelf though. It was the first thing I thought of when I saw the orange outfit, after too many old Sunny D commercials in years past.

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