Three weeks.

Three weeks until Christmas!

Also, at most, three weeks until everyone has blasted through World of Warcraft’s Cataclysm expansion content and are starting to blog about the tedium of heroic 5-man grinds and banging their heads against bugs in the latest raid content.

Coincidental timing?

Blizzard: “Boredom? Finished already? B-but this took us years to produce! You want more content? Uh… Look! Over there! Is that Christmas?!”
[runs off in a puff of dust]

I think with this expansion Blizzard are finally going to realise the monster they have created: a multitude of content devourers, who in a matter of weeks, and like some sort of Slaaneshian army of gluttons, will have stripped the meat from Cataclysm’s carcass and will be furiously gnawing at its bones while sniping at other players who invade their personal space, like a pack of keyboard-hunched hyenas.

Still, I expect it’ll get the WoW blogging presses back into full swing, and thus should provide plenty of material to read out – like bad cracker jokes – to the family when we’re all gathered cheek-puffed and stomach-aching around Christmas dinner.

“I say, I say, I say. According to most bloggers, what do you call WoW’s latest expansion released only three weeks ago?


[numerous groans]

“You can take your joke and shove it! You think it’s funny that we’ve got to wait another seven years for the next expansion and we’ve finished this one already? And you told that same bloody joke last expansion too, it wasn’t funny then and it’s not funny now. Arse. You think I can wait another seven shitting years for the next expansion? Do you?!

“Sorry grandma.”

7 thoughts on “Three weeks.

  1. Melmoth Post author

    Never mind, according to a plan recently leaked onto the Internet, WoW’s next content release will be arriving much quicker than previous examples…

    …ah hah! Hah hah hah! Ah hah hah hah ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

    Ooo, y’know, that’d make a great Christmas cracker joke.

  2. FraidOfTheLight

    Don’t these people appreciate that it’s about the journey, not the destination?

    Hahahaha. Just kidding! Clearly it’s all about the end-game raid content. And the moaning. Oh the moaning!

    After a momentary 13 GB download, I took my first steps in Azeroth for over a year yesterday. The sheer scope of the changes are very impressive.

    The newly redecorated Orgrimmar is quite a sight, and remains as hustly and bustly as ever – especially with all the people who were camped next to the riding trainer, bidding to be the first to be able to fly over Azeroth.

    I expect I’ll pop in later, and keep an eye out for any level 85 Worgen or Goblins.

  3. Melmoth Post author

    The sheer scope of the changes are very impressive.

    I’m sure I’ll be sticking my nose in at some point, if for no other reason than to watch people fly past on their second or third lap of the 1-85 content.

    I expect I’ll pop in later, and keep an eye out for any level 85 Worgen or Goblins.

    The thing is, I think it would actually be hard to decide whether they paid for a race change or genuinely started from level one.

  4. Carson

    Meanwhile, in two years time, as WoW’s fourth expansion is about to release, sites like WoW Insider will have the discussion topic “what is your biggest regret about Cataclysm?”, with the most common responses being along the lines of “that I didn’t get to experience all the content at level 85” or “that the first time I fight Deathwing will be when we roflstomp him at level 90.”

  5. Garumoo

    What I’m dreading in 6 months is looking around and seeing all the devastation and in-progress reconstruction not progressed at all.

    Booty Bay is a mess, gobbos are fixing roofs, there’s seaweed everywhere … and what’s the bet that in 6 months it will all look exactly the same, and will do so for the next 2 years (or more)?

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