Thursday, 0030 hours
Meh. That’s the game uninstalled, worthless pile of junk. Might as well go to bed.
Maybe I should reinstall it and… no. No, I’m never touching it again.
Man, Thursday afternoon off, and nothing to do. Shame that game sucks so badly. I’ll just go around all the MMO forums and tell everyone how terrible it is. Let’s see… “All you suckers ought to start playing this game it is totally amazing!”? Hah, what an idiot. Must be one of the devs under a false name, or a paid shill. I’ll set him right… “Of course if you actually have a life, as I do (with my job that pays so fabulously well I have had to turn down numerous offers to be lead designer of major MMOs and my supermodel wife, my Ferrari doesn’t drive itself you know), you will find yourself at the mercy of sad cases who can afford to play the game all day.”
That’s the MMO forums sorted out, wonder what other people are saying… blah blah blah, brilliant, blah blah blah, rubbish, blah blah blah, people should check This Other Game out instead, it will totally kick That Game’s ass. Hmm. Might as well have a quick look at the website…
OMG look at that concept art OMG it is AMAZING OMG this other game is going to be AMAZING OMG I am totally posting in my blog about it.
OMG look at this dev chat transcript OMG they totally *nail* everything that is wrong with MMOs at the moment at they are totally going to fix and and totally make this other game AMAZING OMG I am totally posting it in my blog.
OMG I just spent hours reading all these community pages and forums and it is totally amazing there are some amazing LOLFUNNY webcomics about this other game and the community is really great and there is amazing fan art and this other game is totally going to be the biggest thing ever in eighteen months time (or maybe two years or a bit longer).
Dammit what kind of idiots do they employ at games shops, I need to reserve a pre-order for this other game and a special edition pre-order and a pre-special pre-edition post-order pre-deluxe box set and they have not even heard of it, I’d better try every other games shop within a thirty mile radius.
“… I know it’s long past closing time, but this is urgent, I tell you. I need the special deluxe collector’s metal tin ultra edition of this other game, and the one that comes with the mecha-penguin pet, not the one that comes with the zombie-wombat, ‘cos the penguin totally has better stats and… yes, I know you’re a wholesale pet food supplier, but I’ve tried every other shop in… ” huh. Line’s gone dead again. I think my phone might be faulty, I should check with the telecom company. Hey, and they might have the pre-order pack with the mecha-penguin…
No luck with reserving the game, never mind, I’ll get back to hyper-analysis of every developer chat or status update. I’ll feed them all into a database and then by running word count analysis and similar I’ll be able to detect which classes they subconsciously favour so I can play them.
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG they’ve announced a pre-pre-pre-pre-pre-alpha pre-stress pre-test of this other game!1!!1!!! The developer says “Please note, this is simply a wide-scale test of some of our networking tech to monitor world-wide performance, and simply consists of a screen that says ‘HELLO SHAUN’ while the program communicates with our servers.” OMG OMG OMG it’s going to be AMAZING OMG I hope I can take part I’m going off to their site now oh man it’s a bit busy with everyone trying to get in *refresh* come on *refresh* *refresh* come on *refresh* *refresh* *refresh* *refresh”
OMG FilePlanet are distributing the client, and you just need to be a SuperHyperUltraMega Subscriber to get it, only fifty bucks a month and a minimum twelve month contract, totally worth it, DOWNLOADING CLIENT NOW, THIS OTHER GAME HERE I COME!