Ever marvelled at how NPCs don’t seem to get confused by player character names?

Spirit: “Welcome wizard, come in, you have been expected.”

Wizard: “I have? Ok.”

Spirit: “I, the great spirit nexus of Umbwanwei, will now bestow upon you the Continual Staff of Magram the Curiously Hairy, as has been told in the volumes of the ancients since beyond memory.”

Wizard: “Oh. Right. Well, thanks.”

Spirit: “Here you are, Gandalf the Wizened, take the staff and lead the forces of light to victory-eternal against the black spiral of the world eater.”

Wizard: “Gondalf.”

Spirit: “I’m sorry?”

Wizard: “My name is Gondalf the Wizened.”

Spirit: “Is it? Hmm, a minor mistranslation of the ancient texts then, for are you not a great wizard? And you have come to me on the only day in ten thousand thousand years when the three suns of Mianos perfectly align. The staff is yours.”

Wizard: “Wow, thanks!”

Spirit: “No go. Go swiftly and fight the invading horde, make them pay for their crimes against our world!”

<Two hours later>

Wizard: “Puff Pant Great spirit nexus of Umbwanwei, I kneel before you your humble servant and offer my praise to you, mightiest of the spirit lords. I have travelled through fire and brimstone, smote the ruins of mine enemies across all the continents of the world in my quest to find you on this great day. I am Gandalf the Wizened, and I come to you now at the turning of the tide, for I claim the destiny that is mine by divine right: I claim the Continual Staff of Magram the Curiously Hairy!”

Spirit: “Oh buggery fuck.”

Shortly afterwards the wizards Gundolf the Woosey, Gondulf the Womaniser and Gandolf Wooler of Wabbits all arrived and the whole situation just got out of control.

The arrival of IamGandalf1347 wasn’t fooling anybody, though.

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