It’s curious how the nefarious population of City of Villains has a university; the game mechanic of the university is to give characters a place to learn about and participate in the recently introduced crafting system. Clearly the developers work on the hero side first and then transfer as much of the effort as possible directly into CoV, converting any glaringly obvious heroic insinuations.

One wonders, though, what a villain university or school would be like…

“Johnson, did you do your homework again? What is the matter with you boy? If you carry on completing coursework and paying attention in class you’ll find yourself out of this university before you can blink, and then you’ll probably have to get a job wearing spandex and helping old grannies get their cats out of trees. Is that what you want?”

“Right! Who was that? Come on, own up, which one of you wasn’t throwing paper planes behind my back? Someone wasn’t throwing them, I can tell. It was you was it, Packard? Well, as a punishment you can go and help old people cross the road for a day. Actually make that two days, because I’m fed-up with you owning up to your crimes, a good villain doesn’t own up to anything. Are you some sort of pansy hero, Packard? Right! Three! Three days, because you’re not even arguing with me over the point. Go on, get out!”

“You! You behind the bike sheds. Stand still, laddie! Right, now, why aren’t you smoking? Explain yourself!”

“Well, Franklin, apparently you’ve been bullying young Thatcher here and stealing his lunch money. What? Oh I’m not punishing you for stealing the money, Franklin. No. But you see, Thatcher tells me that you’ve been failing to steal all of his money, that he’s been keeping some of it hidden from you. You’re a slacker Franklin, so you can be in detention this evening. Top snitching there Thatcher, you can have a house point.”

“Evening everyone. First order of this detention session: you’re all in further detention for bothering to turn up to this one.”

Posted by Melmoth at 8:00 am